Limits

Expand to fit your container

Life has been in the way of creativity lately. And in an effort to take care of myself and my family, I’ve given myself grace to step away from creating and take care of more pressing things.

But, it left me feeling really down.

It wasn’t until last week when I read on Cassie Stephens Instagram about “Taking her creative vitamins” that I realized why.

Once you realize that you’re a creator (and I believe we are all creators), you MUST create on a regular basis.

Failing to do so is like forgetting to eat a meal or take a breath. Without a little dose of creativity in your day or week or month, you’ll feel incomplete.

The tricky part, or one of the tricky parts for me, is realizing the difference between the practice of creating and the product that the world sees.

In my mind, creating looks like finished product. The published blog. The polished manuscript. The framed painting. The “after” photo.

For many decades I’ve lived under the false assumption that if I don’t get to that final product, I’ve wasted my time. This probably ties back to my days as a runner.

Why even run the race if I won’t make it to the finish line?

My new understanding is this: it’s not the finish line that makes me feel whole. It’s the crisp air in my lungs. The birds chirping. The feeling of pavement underfoot. The smell of a dewey spring morning.

So if I can’t run the races anymore (thank you, knees), I can walk.

And if I can’t create a new book draft, I can jot down one word.

If I can’t paint an entire composition, I can paint one tree.

I can expand to fit the container I’m in right now. I can fill it in the way that works for me. I can let go of any expectations for a final product, because that’s not the important part. The important part is the practice. The feeling. The energy that it gives me.

My container is limited these days. Writing time is slim. Demands are demanding. Energy is low. So a few 5-10 minute watercolor sessions with my daughter have been a good compromise. Just enough time to paint something like a little tree.

Will it go anywhere or mean anything? Nope. It’s just a little tree that will probably get tossed someday soon. But no one needs to see you take your vitamins for them to be good for you.

Happy creating.